Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
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