ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
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