your thong is hanging out like whoa
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
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