so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize