I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize