what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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