I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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