Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
