i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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