if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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