and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
