I swear she didn't look like that last week.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
