Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
