super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
