so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
