OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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