WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
