Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Randomize