Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
