i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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