Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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