erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
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