I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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