In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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