this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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