when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
