...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
