Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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