hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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