The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
It's official drugs can't kill me
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
