You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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