Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Randomize
