Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Text me some of your sweat
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
