Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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