If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
