Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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