thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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