I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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