normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
