is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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