oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
