You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
should my penis look like a turkey
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Randomize
