And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Randomize
