went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
