I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Randomize
