Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
