yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
