it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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