just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
