yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Randomize
