Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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